Save the Fireworks for the Holiday
Ignite the Spark, Don’t Steal the Spotlight.
Fireworks are always exciting, especially when you have someone in your family born on the Fourth of July to celebrate. They light up the sky for a few memorable minutes. But no one wants to work in an environment where every day feels like a fireworks show.
Every organization experiences conflict and every leader faces pressure. Yet when every conversation feels explosive, people stop taking risks, stop sharing ideas, and eventually stop aspiring to leadership altogether.
That's exactly how many workplaces feel when the leader is a narcissist. Every meeting is unpredictable. Success belongs to them, while every mistake belongs to someone else. The spotlight matters more than the people.
I've worked for leaders like that. One told me I'd never become a manager and another blocked my promotion because my growth threatened her own. Neither was interested in developing people, they were more concerned about protecting their ego.
The lesson I learned wasn't just how to survive difficult leaders. It was how to recognize the kind of leader I never wanted to become.
Narcissistic leaders don't just affect today's employees, they influence tomorrow's leaders.
Recently, I was speaking with HR colleagues across several industries who shared a common challenge: they're struggling to fill management positions with younger professionals. As Generation X begins to leave the workforce, many Gen Z employees aren't rejecting leadership, they're rejecting the version of leadership they've observed. When management looks like burnout, blame, office politics, and constant emotional landmines, it's fair to ask, "Why would I want that job?"
If you're working for a narcissistic leader today, don't let their leadership define yours. Their behavior is a reflection of their insecurity and not your potential. Keep investing in your own growth. You may need to find a mentor to help champion your development. Celebrate colleagues who lift others up. Most importantly, remember that every difficult boss is teaching you what authentic leadership should look like.
The good news? Leadership doesn't have to feel like a fireworks show.
The best leaders don't demand admiration; they build trust. They don't compete with their teams; they develop and celebrate the successes with them while expanding their ability to shine. If we want more people to say "yes" to leadership, we must stop rewarding ego and start recognizing leaders who create workplaces where people can grow, contribute, and thrive.
This Fourth of July, enjoy the fireworks.
Fireworks fade. The impact of a great leader doesn't.
The best leadership lessons don't always come from great leaders. In Chapter 22 of Unapologetic on Purpose, I share how working for difficult bosses shaped my own leadership, and how those experiences can shape yours, too.
Wishing you and your family a safe, relaxing, and joy-filled Fourth of July.
